Oh how the semi-mighty have fallen.
Pablo Sandoval, once a post season hero and big name acquisition as fallen off of his pedestal and is now nothing more than a piece of bulging, overripe low hanging fruit. Sandoval’s weight, and all of the issues that come with it, take the fun out of ridiculing him simply because every joke that can be made, already has.
In Spring Training Sandoval reported in even worse shape than in 2015, much to the ire of Red Sox Nation. He proceeded to injure his back bending for a ground ball, then lost his job as a starter, and most recently broke his belt on a swing.
On Saturday, his first start of the season, Sandoval’s belt popped, buckling under the weight of his gut as he swung right through a pitch (en route to racking up 3Ks for the day, one shy of a golden sombrero thanks to a walk):
It gets worse though, some snarky Jays fans (quite frankly, I’m jealous) decided to have some fun with Sandoval on Sunday as they brought him a new belt that may be more suitable in size.
Can this get any more pathetic?
It’s not even funny anymore, seriously. It’s annoying. Sandoval has all the time and money he needs each winter to report in shape, yet he can’t. The fat slob can’t even go from morbidly obese to just obese.
Hell, this Spring Sandoval looked more suited to waiting in line at Disney World with a turkey leg in tow than he did being a professional athlete. And honestly if you ask me, the former is where he belongs. Sandoval is no athlete in any sense of the word; he looks bloated, slow; he doesn’t look like a finely tuned athletic machine, he looks like a pillowcase filled to the brim with mashed potatoes that is being dragged out onto the field to bake in the sun each day.
The man can’t even fit into his uniform, and his four strikeouts in seven at bats AND an error so far this season are testament to that fact that he is no longer fit to play. The problem is that after this belt-bursting fiasco, the MLB is wise to the kind of player he is. Anyone that takes on Sandoval’s contract will be buying a $20M per year garbage disposal, and no one other than Cherington is moronic enough to buy that.
My fear is that we’re stuck with Sandoval until he shapes up, or a team is desperate enough to take him, either way I hope the Sox have plenty of XXXXXXXXXL belts handy because Sandoval is going to need a lot of them. Thank God for Travis Shaw because if Sandoval was our only option I’d be jumping into the Charles.
Memo to Sandoval: eat less and workout, it’ll do wonders.