Big Papi wants to be a porn star

Posted on Sep 25 2015 - 6:29am by Tyler Scionti

David Ortiz

The title is correct, you are not crazy.

I got up this morning, worked out, made myself a protein shake and decided to hop on the good old internet to read the news.

And then I read this.

So many regrets, so little time and all before my work day starts.

I didn’t just throw up in my mouth a little, I puked my shake all over the kitchen floor. David Ortiz, Big Papi… a porn star? I think the only grosser candidates would be Kevin Youkilis or Jonny Gomes.

I mean, most ball players when asked what they would do other than play baseball would probably rattle off some inane common place job associated with their major back in college or whatever school they went to like real estate agent or teacher or insurance salesman; but David Ortiz is not most other ball players.

Who knows maybe someone will take him up on it, but if that day comes then it might be time to take a break from the internet.

Side note: buffet fried chicken is NASTY, c’mon Papi you can do better than that.

 
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